Attn Boston Second Shift Listeners

I just posted the following to some of the 2s castcrew lists. Including it here for listeners who are local to Bostonish and want to help the next episode come out sooner!

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Hello all,

Please read this!

Andrew Schwartz contacted me recently. He's working on a project for school studying "grouping & spatial localization", which involves playing sounds for people and seeing if they can identify a source. Because he's studying a very subtle effect, he needs a large number of subjects. These subjects are normally compensated monetarily for their efforts which adds up when you're a student. So, he has offered to do some Second Shift editing in exchange for the 2s crew helping him get people for the experiment on a volunteer basis.

Participation would involve a hearing screening, which should be quick, and then the actual experiment, which should take about an hour. These are usually done separately, but may be done as one appointment in some cases. The audiologist who does the screenings can only see people 10-12 or after hours on Tuesdays.

Please email Andrew at ozydingo gmail, saying that you heard about this through Second Shift, if you would like to participate.

Anyone who is interested in helping 2S come out sooner should please consider participating, as Andrew is one of if not the fastest and savvyest editors we've had on the show, and his assistance would be a real boon. Plus, it will help SCIENCE!

--Brad

edit

Several people have asked where this would be. Sorry, should have included that in the original. Here's word from Andrew about that:

BU campus; the hearing screening is at 635 comm ave, the experiment takes place at 677 Beacon St (All Boston 02215).

Google maps: http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?ie=UTF8&hl=en&msa=0&msid=117827248904793454037.0004719399750478fc871&z=16

Blue placemarks are the above mentioned buildings, blue lines denote what I know of metered parking in the area. Meters are free after 6pm every day and all day sunday.

--Brad

Remembering an end

Today would have been Sequoia and I's ninth anniversary, which means it's been just over a year since the divorce.

I've been awash in thoughts and feelings today. I am happier separate, and would not want things to be different than they are... and yet there's this mixture of loss and shame that I also feel.

I feel the loss not only of the stability and permanence that our marriage had purported to be, but of the things I fell in love with about her. I think of her smile and the memories of a hundred little moments from when we were in college and I was first being struck by that force that is her personality come flooding in, and then I start to cry, filtering out for a while the troubles, even back then, and the baggage that eventually made our relationship untenable.

The shame I feel is about the naivete and presumption of claiming a life partner at age 21 after six months of dating. Yes, yes, I know that shame does no good and that it's silly to be ashamed, etc etc, and I'm not letting it get to me too much, but imagine looking back on your version of what so many say is the happiest, most momentous event of their lives and thinking, "what a fool I was", knowing that you'll both probably bear scars for a long time because of it.

I want to say that, for all that, I still believe I'm better for the experience, including its end (and even some of the scars), but then again, who knows? It's not like I have the slightest clue where paths-not-taken would have led, so I suppose the only question of any merit is "am I happy with who and where I am?", and for the most part, the answer to that is "yes".

It was a bumpy, bruisy trip, but here we are. I'm happy where I am and excited to see where she's going. Sometimes, though, I wish I wasn't watching from quite so far away. It's awkward, the hedgehog's dilemma. There are so many old wounds, and the people we helped each other become are too different for us to be close the way we were, but attempts so far to even reach somewhere in the middle have tended to open up the floodgates of pent-up feelings and un-resolved issues. Too many land-mines. And yet... I really miss the parts of her I don't hate, for lack of a less cynical way of putting it. I miss my friend.